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13 Stories

by Sophie's Dream

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1.
Bad America 03:56
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lap of luxury in a roach motel in sault-st-marie girl working the counter asks me what i know about luxury i go to pack my bags when the conversation lags i can't say much and it doesn't mean much to me stayed up all night building the tower of babel for you you are bleeding and i don't know what to do winter's coming in and the snow falls on your skin desperately we try to wrap the wound i would pluck out my eye if it offends, you were six hundred miles away in the only city i had ever loved, the city i would soon betray bluegrass band in the background winding down we both know how your soul gets around you begin to plead your case and a smile twists your face when i stumbled upon you, i didn't know what i'd found you flicker and you vanish in the swiftly dimming light in a bookstore in iowa city i thought i felt all right i thought i'd broken free but my life caught up with me there are shattered screams on the radio waves tonight i would pluck out my eye if it offends, you were six hundred miles away in the only city i had ever loved, the city i would soon betray we crashed our ships in spite of the lighthouse on the shore i don't know if i can withstand our dark horse dreams anymore this is only just the start of the breaking of your heart i had a dream that i was called to war
2.
Welcome to Nowhereland 02:54
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you stopped by to see if the flowers had grown, but they hadn't much since you left them alone i tried to raise them, but it wasn't the same they knew how you looked, they knew your name you stopped by to see how the old streets looked, and check up on the names in your old address book your ex-lovers, your old friends they're all living in dead ends welcome to nowhereland where we count out our lives with stray grains of sand where we move through your eyesight in bas-relief and we bite at each other to sharpen our teeth welcome to nowhereland where we have our lists of reasonable demands and we all keep our eyes on the door wondering who it'll open for it's sure nice of you to make the trip here no i'm doing okay and i'd like to make clear there've been plenty of others since you on a good day, i don't even miss you i saw two girls fighting down by the junkyard i saw some kids having sex in the back of a car i heard screaming and moaning i heard the wheels of the machine turning and groaning welcome to nowhereland where god turns us away with a wave of his hand where everything's dying and nothing gets born and nobody wants to stay here to mourn welcome to nowhereland you'll want to get out of here soon as you can it's okay, i understand nobody stays longer than planned
3.
Rose's Blues 02:54
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uptown, bar cat blues you ask me to come, but i refuse blood on your face, you are what you choose but you are all i've got to lose so i watch while you get yourself hurt i'll be there, unfair to see you stumble, you don't care rend my clothes, pull my hair you promise, you swear and you put on your invincible smirk and you carry me the two stories up to my room my friends are sleeping like innocence in the womb i lie to them so quiet that i can't believe they buy it i'm really starting to like you, baby we're doomed i don't like this, i don't mind dig beneath me and what do you find? tattered curtain, but who's behind? only prudent, not unkind would you shut up and just let me think? dark out now and we're alone decaying house, this is home muted feet on cobbled stone you fall in where once light shone and i guess you could come in for a drink and you carry me the two stories up to my room my friends are sleeping like innocence in the womb i lie to them so quiet that i can't believe they buy it i'm really starting to like you, baby we're doomed maybe we're doomed baby we're doomed
4.
Radio 03:31
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lift my fingers up to my face never admit that i feel out of place you are sleeping in our bed and i can't live with the things that you said it's dark in our house when you're on your own we've learned how to fear the place we call home you break down my walls, you break down the door i don't think i could stand to be broken anymore i don't know what safety could rest in your arms i believe you when you say that you don't mean me any harm if you want something from me, all you have to do is ask i don't need an explanation, i can forgive you for your past all i'm asking is a sign that i can maybe recognize you cut a couple coupons while you speak of cutting ties at night your voice calls out to me but i don't know where to go we are lurching towards extinction with the days of radio lift your fingers up to my face ask you quietly if you feel out of place you tell me the truth and then you start to cry i hold you close and i'm so hungry i could die so hungry i could die so hungry i could die i don't know what beauty could slip through your self like a wave of paranoia for the book left on the shelf if you seek a higher calling you could give yourself to god but if you're shaken to your spirit then you only smile and nod when i touch you my hands spark just like the horrors of my dreams and i try to hold you tighter like i don't know what it means we hide inside all winter, praying it will snow we are searching for extinction with the days of radio
5.
South of the Beltway, West of the Sun 02:12
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i'd been mad at you about a year i guess it could have been longer though, i have to confess cause it's hard to remember don't kick up embers south of the beltway, west of the sun there's only dead air, are we still having fun? what are you looking for? and why do you say that there has to be more? well, you do what you like and I'll sleep around i see all your old stuff at the lost and found but south of the beltway when i tune it on in your memory grows heavy on my skin smoking, your eyes wet, on riverside drive you made yourself nervous and you wanted to slide you couldn't say or you didn't know dead air on the radio but you've got in your head that it's playing our song i haven't the heart to tell you you're wrong raise your arms in pantomime and the sound fills the air and the sound fills up time well, you do what you like and i'll try to forget you vanish into yourself and i into regret but inside the dead air when i tune it on in your memory grows heavy on my skin
6.
Leuconoe 03:30
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is it okay to still think of someone you've left behind? when you were young, you could hold the whole world in your mind are you older now? do you think it ever mattered anyhow? one of us never left, the other wanders the earth bereft see how the sun shines through the buildings on amsterdam? i never thought i could play the villain but here i am these old clothes, they look nice on you when the morning glows your memory's good company, shouldn't let it get the best of me pour sweet wine, and tie your hair back elegant better forget than live distracted and penitent leuconoe, i know better than to tell you to seize the day where you go in this world, you'll get by sooner or later, so will i pack your bags, and see if the key still sticks in the keyhole open up my head, and see if my dreams still read like your journal are you older now? do you think it ever mattered anyhow? we got our kicks, we had our fun; leuconoe, never trust anyone
7.
Song for Joan (Night) 02:50
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they have to open my eyes so i can see they have to tell me it's night so i feel all right when i just need to sleep they have to open my eyes so i can see they have to lie and deny than i am not what i used to be they have to cling to my hand so i can know that they're there they have to try to find my mind that once could reach them through the air they have to cling to my hand so i can know that they're there they have to show my senses what it meant if suddenly i ceased to care ba da da da da ba da da da da ba da da da da da da they have to hold me here just a little bit more they have to set me aside and hide their fright on the other side of a locked door they have to hold me here just a little bit more so long as she stayed i wasn't afraid but i don't think she's here anymore ba da da da da ba da da da da ba da da da da da da they have to open my eyes, they have to open my eyes they have to open my eyes, they have to open my eyes they have to open my eyes, they have to open my eyes
8.
The Boy Who Dreamed of Smokey Robinson 02:40
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i wanna find him, don't know where to begin the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson what would it mean to me to be with him? the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson leave the house once in two weeks, that's all right pick a point on the ceiling, stare at it all night i woulda done worse to catch his eye but only mine was crying when he walked on by i wanna find him, don't know where to begin the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson what would it mean to me to be with him? the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson the objects around me seem to flicker and fade can't take an interest in the money i made only thing that seems worth it, only thing that seems real i know i'm stuck, but how does he feel? i wanna find him, don't know where to begin the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson what would it mean to me to be with him? the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson i want my baby to love me so i want him to love me if he don't even know say love is crazy, say cupid missed but if you're not looking, do i exist? i wanna find him, don't know where to begin the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson what would it mean to me to be with him? the boy who dreamed of smokey robinson
9.
First Eclogue 03:15
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you know the memory never quite fades away you know the millennium draws nearer every day or so they say, but it'll never be like before there's something rotten on the inside there's something hollow at the core and there's a shadow on the countryside ever since the civil war and i know you've been waiting for the day you can finally rest i love you and i wish you all the best the town that you were born in, the green hills of your youth i don't know how i know they've changed, but i know that it's the truth and so do you, despite all the prayers that we made still all that we see is defiled despite the great price that we paid despite your best hopes for your child, just shadows in the glade i know you still dream at night of the soldiers marching through i love you and i will remember you blood drips from the rocks round here, lightning strikes the trees the same ones where we sealed our pact, breathless on our knees and trusting in god, but god has gone out from this land and if this is the wage of our sin we must live in the fear of his hand or find a new place to begin, but you don't want to understand i know you're still waiting for a world made blameless and new i love you, but there's nothing i can do
10.
Laughed Till I Cried 03:51
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you shouldn't breathe so much you know, it's hard to keep a healthy glow i'm getting younger every day, but just to piss my life away been buying my food at the dollar store, when i run out, go back for more guess you could say i'm living comfortably, but still i miss your company and you said at least we'll know we tried oh, no i laughed till i cried like cosmonauts on stellar missions, we were comrades, shared a vision but then you moved out of this neighborhood, you're pretty sure the world's no good you looked to me for confirmation, i looked at you in consternation since when is this what we're about? it's bound to make your heart give out and you said at least we'll know we tried oh, no i laughed till i cried the only things i know are real are nati trash and pittsburgh steel and i'm sorry if i ever made you doubt it's bound to make your heart give out, it's bound to make your heart give out it's bound to make your heart give out tonight
11.
Il Est Charmant, Ce Garçon 03:00
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it's so good to see you it's always a comfort to know you're doing well it must be nice to be you i wonder who you're taking back with you to the hotel his hair was soft and feathered his eyes were dark and never looked at you he was beautiful, and i had loved you long enough to know what you would do you took him by the hand with a nod of your head, you cued the band and the rest was history he's looking at you like he's walking on air you toss me a smile, run your hand through his hair i'm just glad to see that you missed me next time we meet, you will buy me a drink you will introduce us and ask me what i think well, i like him a lot i like him a lot, i like him a lot he seems really nice and i like him a lot yeah i like him a lot, and without a doubt he seems really nice, so i hope it works out
12.
Eleanor's Gambit 01:20
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we drove past where the streetlights ended barely alive, we were undefended and the moon hung low over the car wheels roll over our old pathless ways and i haven't slept in a couple days but if you say things are okay, then i guess they are bitter air, headlights like a halo waiting for the chariot to swing low but all i hear is sirens in the night the river rolls, tires caked with mud i'd like to touch you but i'm afraid i might draw blood you say we should go back and i guess you're right
13.
Christlike 04:07
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we'll take the train out past the edge of the city we'll look back behind us and won't it be pretty if only we hadn't been dying back there we'll find a place where the stars will still shine and i will be yours and you will be mine and you'll start to heal when you're breathing better air we'll live near the ocean and won't we be safe and you'll stand on your feet and i firm in my faith as i see you stumble, and see you rise again and i'll be just as good as when i was a kid and i'll learn to be humble just as you did when your body betrayed you, you alone among men and your spirit seemed to free itself from that mortal cage grace came to you as if you'd seen the dawning of your age you were christlike you were christlike yes cause the grace of god is ever-present you were beautiful when you were convalescent stuck in your bed you leaned your head on your fist why am i even doing this? we'll get the hell out of here and won't that be nice cause we won't even have bodies and you'll be all right and the rest of the world is dying down there and we'll fly past the stars and we'll light up the sky and we'll live there forever, just you and i laughing and crying so hard that you're gasping for air we'll live near heaven and won't it be true that we'll do all the same things that we used to do before the sickness, before it broke you down and i will hear god like you say that you did and like i maybe used to when i was a kid when the world was silent, before that fatal sound when your spirit seemed to whisper that it always planned for this i hear you collapse in the next room and then nothing else exists you were christlike you were christlike and i'm sorry i'm so sorry

about

Mrs. Cadwallader said, privately, "You will certainly go mad in that house alone, my dear. You will see visions. We have all got to exert ourselves a little to keep sane, and call things by the same names as other people call them by...Sitting alone in that library at Lowick you may fancy yourself ruling the weather; you must get a few people around you who wouldn't believe you if you told them. That is a good lowering medicine."
"I never called everything by the same name that all the people about me did," said Dorothea, stoutly.
"But I suppose you have found out your mistake, my dear," said Mrs. Cadwallader, "and that is a proof of sanity."
Dorothea was aware of the sting, but it did not hurt her. "No," she said, "I still think that the greater part of the world is mistaken about many things."
--George Eliot, Middlemarch

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SOPHIE'S DREAM reeks of havoc
SOPHIE'S DREAM is putting the "more" back in moron

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if other sophie's dream albums are like novels, this one is like a collection of short stories. although some of these characters appear on other records, they largely don't travel from song to song on this record. so don't feel obligated to listen in order or all the way through.

credits

released November 10, 2018

sophie's dream is or has been nathan, eva, and rl.

nathan: vox, guitars, bass, cajon, rain stick, tambourine, curious george drum, dreamcatcher drum, xylophone, concierge's bell, maracas, melodica, ukulele, bag of blocks, top, organ, poptube, claps, harmonica, spoons, length of flexible plastic tube, casio, microkorg, canjo, recorder, drum kit, unplugged patch cords, dehumidifier, songwritering, ipad operation
eva: vox, bass, drum machine, claps, cymbals, fan, ipad operation
rl: mixing, mastering

these songs were written from 2013 to 2018 in cincinnati, hibbing, glenwood springs, washington, d.c., and new york. recorded in summer 2018 in nathan's basement and eva's warehouse in cincinnati, using only a borrowed ipad.
av did the illustrations included in the download and the album cover.
this album is for nick, without whom there never would have been a sophie's dream, and for mallory. mazel tov!

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